For goodness' sake
Stop asking a woman when she plans to have her first child.
Or second.
Stop telling her that time is ticking.
She knows.
She may have tried to, many times...
From tears and prayers
To pills and being under the knife.
She may have tried it all.
Or maybe she didn't try anything.
She just knows she can't or shouldn't.
Perhaps she doesn't want one.
Don't ask her why.
She must have her reasons.
And she doesn't have to justify them.
For goodness' sake
Stop telling her that a sibling is the best gift she could give her first-born.
Maybe, just maybe, the first born itself was a miracle.
Or a result of much pain, needles and loss.
Perhaps she cannot go through it again.
Perhaps she can, but decided not to.
Perhaps, one is all she always wanted.
Or one is more than she ever hoped for.
For goodness' sake
Stop judging a woman who doesn't want a child at all.
She doesn't need to follow a template.
She isn't selfish, strange or anything else you may think her to be.
She is just her.
So let her be.
For goodness' sake
Stop telling a woman that she shouldn't have any more children.
Three or four or five or seven...may be enough.
For you.
But not her.
For goodness' sake
Stop the casual small talk about a woman's childbearing plan over dinner or someone else's baby shower.
It's personal. It's intimate. And it often hurts.
If she wants your advice,
She will ask for it.
Trust me.
For goodness' sake
Stop asking a woman when she plans to have a child.
"Plans" don't work for many.
And no two "plans" look the same anyway.
